To lay a foundation for this article I start off borrowing a bit of Lindsay’s church talk previously posted.
Acquainted with anxieties and inabilities in speech, Moses was a man assigned a near intolerable task. In preparation for the assignment, Moses was shown the suffering that all mankind would ever experience. While speaking with the Lord face to face, he was shown every individual who would live on earth(Moses 1:27-29.) Undoubtedly, one of the foremost points taken by Moses would have been the suffering experienced by God’s children. After seeing the history of the world, Moses questioned the Lord, “Tell me, I pray thee, why these things are so…?”(verse 30) or in other words, what is the purpose of all this suffering, what is mortal life’s worth compared to its cost.
And here is the Lord’s response. “For mine own purpose have I made these things. Here is wisdom and it remaineth in me”(verse 31.)
At face value, this is a maddening statement. In fact, it seems the heavenly equivalent of, “The suffering is because I am God, and because I Said So.”
But…the statement is much deeper than a simple flippant response…This statement is actually a request for faith…one of the most significant requests for faith in all scripture…Faith, not of God’s existence, but more importantly, in God’s CHARACTER in the face of sickness and suffering, of horrors and holocaust, of anguish and agony on a global and personal level each item within view of God’s all-seeing eye (Moses 1:6.)
…As he exercised this faith, Moses became a man of action. He agreed to carry out the will of God, as difficult and undesirable as the task was.
In so doing, Moses became the representative of prolonged suffering, plagues and the Angel of Death to the Egyptians and to many of the Hebrews he led (Exodus 16:2-3)(Exodus 11:3-7).
One must see how necessary it was for Moses to first be acquainted with the grief that would consume mankind, and notwithstanding, still maintain a firm faith in God and his plan. This qualified him to enact the plagues, to lead a people through 40 years of longsuffering in the wilderness, and to show the world God’s wonders.
End of Quote From Lindsay’s Talk
Several times after Lindsay delivered her talk, she and I were approached by members of the audience who wanted to point out we had not addressed the God/Moses conversation in its entirety. Without fail, each of them referenced the same verse that occurs shortly after the “For mine own purpose…”(verse 31) statement. The verse they all quoted is a statement from the LORD:
“For behold, this is my work and my glory – to bring to pass the
immortality and eternal life of man.” (Moses 1:39)
In truth, this statement was left out of the talk deliberately, and not because it doesn’t support the premise. This “my work and my glory” statement is one of the most well-known verses in all of LDS culture. It is so because of its simplistic, yet grand concession by the God of the Old Testament that He does what He does to achieve mankind’s “immortality and eternal life”, and finds this work glorifying. I believe it to be a statement that, in and of itself, could be well accepted as truth among all Judeo-Christian faiths.
This “work and glory” statement was excluded from the talk because it IS TOO FAMILIAR to its audience. A Mormon, even hearing its first three words, tunes out, saying to themselves, “I’ve heard this one a million times…😒 NEXT.” They would give it SO LITTLE THOUGHT that, if included in the talk, they would not pay attention well enough to realize THEY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT MEANS.
Consider this, you have a statement, made by a Being advanced enough to create the universe, speaking to an individual educated in 15th century BC. This Being is using words like “immortality” and “eternal life.” It is the situational equivalent of Einstein trying to explain the Theory of Relativity to a child who has undertaken the task to discover what the big-hand on a clock represents. Even if Jehovah were addressing Einstein, without a doubt, Einstein’s only catching a small portion of what is relayed. Because the terms immortality and eternal life are mortal shadows of higher dimensional concepts. A mortal 4th-dimensional being (living in the dimensions of space and time) has zero references for 5th plus-dimensional concepts. In a way, it is like saying the color seven tastes like the sound of hot. It’s nonsensical…incomprehensible. And, in truth, if I’m Moses, and I hear God throwing out inanimate time terms, the mortal me silently word associates the following:
“Eternity! That’s a long time!…TIME. Wait! Is it DINNER TIME?
Cause climbing this mountain made me hungry….
Where did that sheep get off to that I was chasing?”
And even if Moses was God-granted the ability to comprehend the higher dimensional meaning of these things at the moment, WHY are we convinced, 3500 years later, that we adequately comprehend these concepts via a diluted verbal explanation washed through a translation or two.
Now, PLEASE…don’t misunderstand me. I am NOT SAYING that Moses did not speak with God. What I AM SAYING, however, is – HOW SELF-DELUSIONAL ARE WE…thinking…OH YEAH…I GET IT…Who wouldn’t do what Moses did with the vague promise of life eternal. Of my readers how many of you think it an easy jump of faith to go from the quiet lifestyle of a rural shepherd to:
Moses, here is a highly technological stick…with it I want you to do the following to the
military AND civilian population of Egypt:
Taint their water supply
Introduce several mass infestations of pests (psychological warfare)
Destroy their working and food source livestock (likely biological warfare)
Use a wind-dispersed agent to cause widespread skin boils on people and animals alike (chemical warfare)
Destroy all agriculture suitable for consumption by utilizing weather abnormalities and further pest infestation
Utilize extended unprecedented darkness (more psychological warfare)
Kill all their firstborn…Moses: Even the kids???!!!…God: Even the kids.
Okay, okay. I will give you that the 15th century BC was a different time…that Moses likely had military training and a confirmed history of violence…and, most importantly, the Children of Israel had been enslaved for 400 years. But in our day and age, we are HORRIBLE at granting grace to any historical figure who has done something distasteful according to the social norms of the morally superior 21st century.
If we were to weigh Moses against the social standards of today, we may find the culturally enlightened wanting to do away with the Torah all together.
Now clearly I’m exercising a bit of hyperbole, but I do so to make it perfectly clear that the God of our current day culture is at odds with the God of the Old Testament. With each passing generation, the character of God increasingly offers a more comfortable spirit, a more joyful experience, a more entitled lifestyle despite the expense. But there is an expense for this social and religious contentment. That expense is a NEGLECT to REMEMBER. A neglect to remember that we are the same biological and psychological beings that populated the earth 100, 1000, 5000 years ago. A neglect to remember that the same God that has allowed us to live in an era of air conditioned homes, is the same God that kept the Children of Israel in the wilderness for 40 years. A neglect to remember that the same God who DID NOT intervene to prevent the genocides of the 20th century, is the same God who commanded Joshua to eliminate the Canaanites. And a neglect to remember that the same God who inquired of Satan “Hast thou considered my servant Job” is also the same God that allows the plagues, the accidental deaths, and the suicidality that occur in our day.
Yet, somehow, as intelligent and information affluent as we are in our age, and less than 35 years removed from the Soviet Union and Berlin Wall, we have forgotten of man’s profound ability to repress and enslave one another. We have forgotten that such actions have historically been correlated to the diminishment of understanding and respect for God.
Another event, slightly older, but far more unforgivable to forget, is the European appeasement granted the Nazi’s in the 1930’s. It was by far the easier path to show kindness, avoid conflict. But kindness is predictable, and the corrupt use it for fuel. There is nothing in history so nauseating in hindsight than the image of the Conservative Party Leader Neville Chamberlain (regal, intelligent, and kind) expressing his pride as England’s Prime Minister for achieving “peace for our time.” Fresh off the plane from Munich, September 1938, Chamberlain praises himself and Herr Hitler for diplomatically engineering the Munich Agreement https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQ95ffnU4Sw . Shortly thereafter, a Conservative member of Chamberlain’s cabinet resigned stating that Britain had “lost the COURAGE to see things AS THEY ARE”(emphasis added.) Less than 18 months later, Chamberlain resigned from office following the Nazi invasion of Western Europe. Six months after his resignation, Chamberlain was dead. Four and a half years following Chamberlain’s death, 12 million had died in Nazi death camps.
No one ever accused Chamberlain of being unkind. But as honorable that accolade may be, it fades when knowing when it counted, Chamberlain was not courageous.
Courage is the first of human qualities because it is the quality that guarantees all the others. – Aristotle (quoted by Winston Churchill)
A common Christian rebuttal to the Old Testament God theory is that Jesus Christ fulfilled the Mosaic Law, bringing about a much more genteel religious experience. However, I believe it is the work of evil that would have us forget that Christ was often reproachful, accusatory, and divisionary. Though kind to the humble and pure in heart, when it came to the corrupt, CHRIST WAS NOT KIND. When you envision Christ chasing moneychangers from the temple grounds do you imagine a gentle and soft demeanor?… When he referred to the Pharisees as “whited sepulchres,” was His intent social harmony? His mission required a God’s courage to overcome corruption of this life, and the next. Had His primary quality been kindness, the corrupt and the pure in heart would both have had the same pleasant social experience with Jesus of Nazareth. Had this been the case, Christ would have NO STORY AT ALL. He would have created no conflict. Without conflict, Christ would have no power of influence, even to inspire kindness. But this was NOT His character. Instead His COURAGE TO OPPOSE CORRUPTION EMPOWERED HIS KINDNESS.
Listen to this from Luke 12 (EMPHASIS ADDED):
51 Suppose ye that I am come to give peace on earth? I tell you, NAY; BUT RATHER DIVISION:
52 For from henceforth there shall be five in one house divided, three against two, and two against three.
53 The father shall be divided against the son, and the son against the father; the mother against the daughter, and the daughter against the mother; the mother in law against her daughter in law, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
54 And he said also TO THE PEOPLE, When ye see a cloud rise out of the west, straightway ye say, There cometh a shower; and so it is.
55 And when ye see the south wind blow, ye say, There will be heat; and it cometh to pass.
56 YE HYPOCRITES, ye can discern the face of the sky and of the earth; but HOW IS IT THAT YE DO NOT DISCERN THIS TIME?
57 Yea, and why EVEN OF YOURSELVES JUDGE YE NOT WHAT IS RIGHT?
Anyone catch that? Christ was critical of His followers for their casual assessment of current events and their deluded personal convictions.
If one reads the 2nd half of Luke Chapter 11 and the beginning of chapter 12, you can appreciate the tone that Christ takes with the people. In chapter 11, Christ describes the corruption of social and religious leaders. He labels them hypocrites for the corruption they weave into society, holding positions of influence. At the start of chapter 12, He warns His disciples of “the leaven of the Pharisees.” This is a clear caution that the religious air of the day is misguided. Paraphrasing, He states that things are not as they seem (yet all hidden things will be revealed.) Knowing these followers are indoctrinated with the cultures of the day, a bold statement accusing them of mental apathy is needed. HOW IS IT THAT YE DO NOT DISCERN THIS TIME? and WHY EVEN OF YOURSELVES JUDGE YE NOT WHAT IS RIGHT? Of course it is appropriate for Christ to deliver this accusation of indifference to his people who are unwilling (or incapable) of seeing corruption through their cultural obsession with anticipated peace and deliverance. Christ is days away from suffering the Atonement (the kindest act in all Christianity) to overcome universal corruption. One might imagine His frustration when seeing those He would suffer infinitely for thinking to themselves, “Won’t it be nice when Jesus makes everything peaceful.” Similar to the 1930’s European desire of “peace for our time” you can see Christ’s followers exercising a complete ignorance of the cost of peace.
DEEP BREATH
So how does this all apply to my desire to be dead?
When a person is weighing the thought of serious suicide, their is a natural cost benefit analysis.
“I deliver myself from this mental anguish, and do so at a cost to those left behind.” There are several impactful costs one weighs when considering collateral damage on loved ones. And though the cost to my family was always of greatest consideration, there was always a significant personal risk to leaving this life that simmered in the back of my thoughts. A risk that I could not properly assess for lack of information. That risk was the question of quality in the existence that follows this life? And I’m not referring to the possibility of eternal torment in hell. What I am referring to is what is known about the greatest being in the universe. If God, whose company I profess I would like to be in, has the position of ultimate joy, ultimate comfort, ultimate happiness, ultimate peace (pick your preferred pleasantry that is generally preached across the Christian World today) then, by comparison, any position subordinate to Him would, no matter how heavenly, have a lesser pleasantness. And knowing what I do about this omniscient Being, from an earthly parental perspective, His is the MOST UNDESIRABLE EXISTENCE imaginable.
Having a fore knowledge of the earth’s history, as one would assume God has, would be an overwhelming deterrent to any moral being considering to undertake the creation of such a world. Consider all the pain, suffering, sickness, misery and torture you would witness YOUR CHILDREN enduring every day for thousands of years. From that comfortable 21st century perspective spoken of earlier, God’s knowledge of and power over the earth’s morbid history is morally unforgivable. So why is it that we would want to return to His presence?
This is where Moses’ vision comes into play. According to a Latter-day Saint account of Moses’ initial meeting with Jehovah, he was shown the history of the world. Now whether Christians in general should consider this valid is, to me, a moot point. The Christian world believes other prophets saw the same vision (e.g. Revelations), so why not Moses.
Here is a small recap from Lindsay’s talk that helps to connect the thoughts:
While speaking with the Lord face to face, he (Moses) was shown every individual who would live on earth (Moses 1:27-29.) Undoubtedly, one of the foremost points taken by Moses would have been the suffering experienced by God’s children. After seeing the history of the world, Moses questioned the Lord, “Tell me, I pray thee, why these things are so…?”(verse 30) or in other words, what is the purpose of all this suffering, what is mortal life’s worth compared to its cost.
And here is the Lord’s response. “For mine own purpose have I made these things. Here is wisdom and it remaineth in me”(verse 31.)
…This is a maddening statement. In fact, it seems the heavenly equivalent of, “The suffering is because I am God, and because I Said So.”
But in reality, the statement is much deeper than a simple flippant response. When thought upon, the statement is actually a request for faith… one of the most significant requests for faith in all scripture…faith in an elevated form. Faith, not of God’s existence, but more importantly, in God’s CHARACTER in the face of sickness and suffering, of horrors and holocaust, of anguish and agony on a global and personal level each item within view of God’s all-seeing eye (Moses 1:6.)… God’s statement to Moses is a request to trust Him when all influences, external and internal, would say otherwise.
This was a defining moment for Moses… As he exercised this faith, Moses became a man of action. He agreed to carry out the will of God, as difficult and undesirable as the task was.
But, remember, in so doing, Moses became the representative of prolonged suffering, plagues and the Angel of Death to the Egyptians and to many of the Hebrews he led (Exodus 16:2-3)(Exodus 11:3-7).
One must see how necessary it was for Moses to first be acquainted with the grief that would consume mankind, and notwithstanding, still maintain a firm faith in God and his plan. This qualified him to enact the plagues, to lead a people through 40 years of longsuffering in the wilderness, and to show the world God’s wonders.
End of Talk Quote
So…for me, the BIG QUESTION IS…what is it that convinced Moses that God’s character was impeccable enough to justify warfare on a nation’s civilian population as well as to wilderness-wander for 40 years? Why doesn’t Moses just take the easy route out and kill himself? (a suicidal person might ask.)
The answer of course is faith in God’s character…but in my opinion, that’s an unlikely leap of faith if you believe God unquestionably kind. Until one summer afternoon in 2019, while discussing this burning bush assignment with two friends, I inadvertently stumbled upon a realization that would only come to someone as stubborn as myself. As my friends tried to douse my cynicism of the Jehovah/Moses exchange, without forethought, I blurted out the following:
If I’m Moses and God gives me the assignment to plague the Egyptians…the first question I ask God is…HAVE YOU DONE THIS?
Prepare to pause and think this out. It is a question that is more important than you might consider. Because what you believe God’s response to be reveals much of how you personally interpret God’s character. You may find that the answer “Yes” and the answer “No” undoubtedly cause drastically different behaviors from Moses as they respectively influence his confidence in God. As you think upon this, your pondering may be for you, as it was for me, a defining moment of your own character. It was so for me because I was able to ask God that very question as to why He would allow me the tortured experience of mental despair.
Should you ask God the same question about the overwhelming difficulties in your own life, you should prepare yourself. To do so is to engage the God of 21st century culture with the God of Abraham, Isaac and Israel. Such an engagement will require COURAGE on your part…COURAGE TO SEE THINGS AS THEY ARE.
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